Now I've heard everything!

[grahamthomson]

At work, from time to time, we get silly requests. But the one we had this morning tops them all.

A lady came in, first thing, and sat down and asked for a "coffee book". Initially we thought something arty for the coffee table. But, no.

Apparently she's a line manager for a large firm and sick and tired of people getting her coffee wrong.

So, by "coffee book", she wanted us to print a booklet with tear-out "tabs" that were the exact colour of her "perfect" cup of coffee. She would then give these tabs to her staff so they could use them to judge the strength of the coffee they make for her and thus "get it right for once!"

With a wry smile I suggested she go and make her perfect cup of coffee and bring it back to us, and we would then compare the colour and find the nearest match to our Pantone swatch book.

I'll let you know if she comes back!!

[Hero]

Sounds like a unique task there Graham.

If she is that uptight about people making her coffee wrong, she should go make it herself. Some people should feel privilleged that others make a drink for them to start with.

I've seen a tea chart before with colour tones of strength, with lighter tones apparentley acting as a sedative and the darker tones being the obvious caffiene boost. Maybe that is where the idea came from through seeing something simular.

Still, if this lady is willing to pay good money to get the coffee book done for the sake of a quality cup 'o Joe it is a challenge worth tackling especially if the results are effective.

I wonder if Starbucks or Costa have such a booklet

===HERO

[Andy Turnbull]

What a self absorbed bint.

Sounds like a deeply horrible person to work for.

Andy

[The Doctor]

People who think they are masters of the universe piss me off.

Unless, of course, they wear furry pants.

-Ralph

[Fortmax2020]

I take my tea as it comes. I'm grateful enough if someone makes me one!

But if He-Man were to make my cup if tea.... I think my head would pop.

[The Doctor]

He would make the tea by punching the teapot.

-Ralph

[Fortmax2020]

Heeeee-MAN!

[Nigel]

I don't drink coffee so I'm only guessing here, but surely the perfect flavour/colour match would only work with certain blends?

Graham, see if you can secretly convince the company's buyer to buy a different coffee brand, then your customer will have to come back to get a new book!

[The Doctor]

Oct 21, 2009 10:41:26 GMT Fortmax2020 said:

Heeeee-MAN!

*throws back head and laughs*

-Ralph

[grahamthomson]

Oct 21, 2009 10:44:05 GMT Nigel said:

I don't drink coffee so I'm only guessing here, but surely the perfect flavour/colour match would only work with certain blends?

Graham, see if you can secretly convince the company's buyer to buy a different coffee brand, then your customer will have to come back to get a new book!

Heh - problem is, she is the company's buyer!!

We're still waiting for her return with a flask of "perfect" coffee. I wonder what it tastes like.

I enjoy a hot mug of Waitrose Columbian every day at 2 pm, but the rest of the day I have chamomile or peppermint.

[Fortmax2020]

I stopped drinking coffee a few years ago but had a considerable number of cups on the first day of a conference recently. I don't remember much from the second day except a splitting headache. And James Bond.

[The Doctor]

I enjoy coffee but alas only drink it very rarely as it gets me high as a kite. It can also have laxative effects. So, if I 'haven't been' to a special place for a while, I can't drink coffee in a public place to avoid embarrassment, just in case.

I probably only have coffee about 1-3 times a month.

I drink tea even less regularly. Usually just at interviews and funerals.

-Ralph

[jameso]

I don't really drink hot drinks, so I've never really got the group mentality of making everyone in the office a cup of tea. I'm fair in the camp that if she doesn't like other people's tea she should make her own.

[Deleted]

i cant stand coffee, working in a cafe where we sell alot of coffee was enough to put me off it for ever (left that cafe now btw)

my boss was picky too, like the froth on the capuccino had to be xcm high or something just as rediculous

we did used to get people from the states sometimes asking for "skinny lattes" or something, and we would all just look at eachother confused and scared lol

[Grand Moff Muffin]

Oct 21, 2009 11:07:36 GMT Fortmax2020 said:

I stopped drinking coffee a few years ago but had a considerable number of cups on the first day of a conference recently. I don't remember much from the second day except a splitting headache. And James Bond.

Then you remembered the important things. (And your headache.)

I've only had a few cups of coffee in my life, because habitual coffee drinkers appear to need to drink it in order to do what the rest of us do without it, and I don't like to be dependent on such things, but I did recently drink a cup of tea/coffee recently when I mistook the coffee jug for the hot water jug at a meeting. It was OK!

Love coffee-flavoured chocolate, mind.

Martin

[The Doctor]

Oh yes, coffee chocolates are great. Most people hate them so I tend to hoover up the unwanted coffee ones in chocolate boxes.

-Ralph

[Deleted]

At work we only have vending machines and I usually have cappuccino out of these. It isn't really cappuccino though because the vending woman (who services the machines) once told me that it was just a mix of coffee and hot chocolate so why they call it cappuccino I don't know! At home I just have one cup of coffee in the morning and the odd cup of tea every other time.

[karla]

I like coffee, really should try some more aside nescafe lol!!!!!!

What I don't like is kettle limescale getting in your drink and it gets stuck in your throat.

Chocolate covered coffee beans are the best, sometimes get them sent from my mums side in Bolivia. Ticked and buzzing for hours

[Andy Turnbull]

Not a fan of coffee, although I do like a caramel machiato. A tea drinker at heart, but I avoid caffeine in it these days, with my preferred tea of choice being peppermint.

Very refreshing.

Andy

[Hero]

Tea person here too, although I also like caramel machiato from Starbucks now and again.

Green Tea is my favourite.

===KEN

[KoshNaranek]

I drink waaaay too much tea and really need to cut back. Not a coffee person really, the smell puts me off.

I can tell that I wouldn't last long working for this particular "lady" as if she didn't like the cuppa I brought her I'd probably tell her to fuck off and make her own.

- Tony

[dinogrrl]

Can't do coffee, too bitter, gives me a headache. Likes my Lady Grey tea, I do.

But this woman is a twat. Must be a wonder to work for.

[Shockprowl]

I say execute her! The boss woman, not dinogrrl.

[Grand Moff Muffin]

Hoi, we know hardly anything about her! She may be a lovely person and a delight to work for!

Martin

[Andy Turnbull]

I doubt that!

Andy

[Grand Moff Muffin]

Well, who here has not one personal trait that, if recounted in isolation, would create an equally unfavourable impression?

Any petty tyrant can print off a shade of brown to show how their coffee should look using a normal colour printer. It takes a tyrant with style to go to a high-class professional publisher and request a coffee _book_.

Or... you could be right, and she's a monster.

Martin

[blueshift]

We have a machine at work, so everyone's coffees are the same. It is beautiful communism in action.

[Bogatan]

Never drank tea or coffee, but had three jobs having to serve it, first in a pub trying to make latte etc on a really dodgey machine, then on a counter at Somerfield were I had to grind beans and give advice on the various kinds, my first day at work I had to go on a coffee course. Oh the fun. Learning about the beans was fairly interesting the tasting section was quite horrible. I might have swallowed three drops. Then 2 weeks as a runner making/purchasing coffees for big important types. It wa a bad period unsuitable jobs.

Unpleasant as the woman sounds I probably would be glad to have the book if I had to deal with her everyday.

Andy

[grahamthomson]

An update for you;

The lady rang this morning to inform us that she'd made other arrangements. She's found a company that manufactures promotional mugs. On the inside of the mug she's having two lines, the lower one for "hot water" and the upper one for "milk".

We wished her well in all all her future endeavours.

[blueshift]

But how do they know how much coffee to put in