Mental Health thread

[Jim]

On the occasions I manage to do that, I find it works for me too.

Lately I've also started to value "not putting things off". I have been terrible for that for years, and have been finding that getting through the list of things I have to get done early in the day generally lifts me for the rest of the day.

I've also taken to heart a few suggestions from Oliver Burkeman's This Column Will Change Your Life from the Grauniad. It's by no means the font of all wisdom, but it does throw up the occasional really good suggestion. There's a book collection I bought my girlfriend for Christmas.

-Jim

[The Doctor]

I also find getting away helps. I've upped my number of trips away this year and have benefited from doing so. Requires a bit of planning budget-wise but doable. Currently thinking of basing myself in Windsor at some point next year to do LEGOLAND and some exploring.

-Ralph

[legios]

I'd agree with this. The simple act of getting away to somewhere else can be very beneficial. I am fortunate that I have family dotted around in locations across the south of the UK which comes in handy for going visiting, but even a night away somewhere can work wonders for the frame of mind.

I try to budget so as to be able to space out some trips away across the year, I find it helps to break things up and stop me getting caught up in cycles of always doing the same things.

Karl

[Jim]

Absolutely! Getting away, especially somewhere unfamiliar, is a great thing for mental health, and is one reason why we're looking for somewhere cheaper to live so we can budget for more time away.

Windsor seems quite nice; despite living in Reading for four years a decade ago I only got round to visiting this summer. Didn't do Legoland though, we're waiting until the little one can really appreciate it (much to my disappointment).

-Jim

[Marc Graham]

At this point I'm really looking forward to Scotcon as a chance to get away, work is pretty stressful this year, been in a new team since Feb and every few weeks its a big push to meet some artificial target and its gone on and on, with people asked to work extra every so often. This time our team leader decided to share his idea of "everyone comes to work on saturday" with management at our parent company, so next Saturday is strongly-encouraged over-time. I've said no everytime so far, but have caved this time (I did loads of unpaid overtime back in 2010 including weekends, I'm taking minor consolation that this will be paid).

[The Doctor]

I've taken quite a wobble in the last week. I can never differentiate work from the rest of life. What I do informs my character too deeply. So if work is going well I feel well. If it's going badly I feel dreadful. Very little control over events at the moment. Very upsetting.

-Ralph

[Grand Moff Muffin]

Oct 20, 2012 18:52:42 GMT The Doctor said:

I've taken quite a wobble in the last week. I can never differentiate work from the rest of life. What I do informs my character too deeply. So if work is going well I feel well. If it's going badly I feel dreadful. Very little control over events at the moment. Very upsetting.

That makes a lot of sense, and I can see how the effect must be magnified in an emotionally intense field of work. In the absence of a family my work also dominates my life, and when I got fed up with my job in 2007 it effectively equated with me being dissatisfied with my life in general, and led to various attempts at Internet dating and what-not to find life satisfaction. In the end I realised I just needed to change jobs.

I don't talk about my work much because (a) I love it right now, (b) I don't want to jinx it, and (c) I shouldn't talk about it on-line because of its nature, but it probably does have too big a hold on my thoughts when I'm not in work for my own good in the long term. I need to try to regain the balance I had a couple of years ago when I generally switched off when I left the office.

Still, it's all better than being in a job you don't care about, or think does anyone any good.

Martin

[Philip Ayres]

I've had to deal with having work permanently taken out the equation.

I don't miss the stress, some of the rubbish I was forced to do and some of the idiots I had to work with/for..... but I miss the people in general, the social contact, the job satisfaction of knowing I was doing something that was helping other people do their job.

Just the little bits I still do - the projection for church and the occasional snap bit of xl for people help me realise I was good. But the concentration is gone now - see recent problems writing blog entries and reviews - and is waaaaay to short for any major work. And that's without the pain and the tiredness being factored into the equation.

[Marc Graham]

Sorry to hear that Ralph, work can have a huge influence in mood and directs your life to an extent at times.

I used to derive a lot of confidence from being pretty awesome at my job, these days not so much. I'm trying to learn that its just a thing that pays the bills. Easier said than done.

Phil - you are a legend and now a father and keep yourself well busy Still, sad that your circumstances don't enable you to work - but kudos on your awesomeness.

PS - Ralph you are also awesome (other hubbers your awesomeness may vary, but you've still got it!)

PPS - Still maybe a little drunk today!

[Grand Moff Muffin]

My personal view is that anyone who thinks you need _everything_ in order to be happy (i.e. marriage, children, fulfilling job, fulfilling activities outside work, loads of money, reputation, etc.) in order to be happy is a fool. But I do think everyone needs _something_ to be passionate about, whether it's family, friends, work, voluntary activities, or whatever. If you can manage to juggle more than one, you're lucky, because it means you've got a backup if one goes wrong.

Work's pretty dominant for me at the mo, in a good way. I'd like to think that if it ceased to be fulfilling, I could increase my activity in other areas of my life to fill the void, and perhaps I should give more time and thought to my blood relatives, etc. as it is. But work's the main thing for now.

Martin

[Shockprowl]

Just a few thoughts on work. My job as a Paramedic is a fantastic job and I'm very lucky to do it. True life and death stuff doesn't happen all the time, but it does happen. When i do get a bad job, it's impossible to not take it home. Thankfully Mrs Shockers is, firstly, insistant on me telling her about bad jobs, and secondly very good to talk to about such things, and for this I am both relieved and grateful. I also consider myself lucky in that my strength has always been that I'm able to deal with things and quickly move on, armed as I am in the knowledge that I did everything I could. I think where you do a job which is a vocation, where it is emotionally challenging, it can be hard to seperate it from your everyday life. Thankfully that's something I've always been able to do. But what I think can be worse than 'taking work home with you' is botteling things up, not expressing them, not feeling them. Many of my work colleagues do this, I've observed, possibly because botteling things up is easier than dealing with them at the time. Everyone I work with are excellent professionals who realy care about their work, but I often see a certain detachment in those people who don't deal with their emotions from work. In short, I think I'm trying to say that it's better to feel than not feel, or pretend you don't feel. The trick is finding ways to deal with it and move on.

[Grand Moff Muffin]

Oct 22, 2012 9:47:40 GMT Shockprowl said:

Just a few thoughts on work. My job as a Paramedic is a fantastic job and I'm very lucky to do it. True life and death stuff doesn't happen all the time, but it does happen. When i do get a bad job, it's impossible to not take it home. Thankfully Mrs Shockers is, firstly, insistant on me telling her about bad jobs, and secondly very good to talk to about such things, and for this I am both relieved and grateful. I also consider myself lucky in that my strength has always been that I'm able to deal with things and quickly move on, armed as I am in the knowledge that I did everything I could. I think where you do a job which is a vocation, where it is emotionally challenging, it can be hard to seperate it from your everyday life. Thankfully that's something I've always been able to do. But what I think can be worse than 'taking work home with you' is botteling things up, not expressing them, not feeling them. Many of my work colleagues do this, I've observed, possibly because botteling things up is easier than dealing with them at the time. Everyone I work with are excellent professionals who realy care about their work, but I often see a certain detachment in those people who don't deal with their emotions from work. In short, I think I'm trying to say that it's better to feel than not feel, or pretend you don't feel. The trick is finding ways to deal with it and move on.

Have some karma for a quality post.

Martin

[The Doctor]

My problem is that however hard I try I can rarely stay in a 'it's just a job' frame of mind for very long. I need to know that there's a moral point to every penny I make. Yet I think if I could get some perspective on working life and/or find something to be really passionate about in another sphere of life I would hopefully be a somewhat happier and more fulfilled individual. Unfortunately I find it hard to focus on that as I am pretty much permanently terrified of being unemployed again. I've never been the same since my first period out of work a few years ago.

-Ralph

[Marc Graham]

Oct 22, 2012 9:47:40 GMT Shockprowl said:

Just a few thoughts on work. My job as a Paramedic is a fantastic job and I'm very lucky to do it. True life and death stuff doesn't happen all the time, but it does happen. When i do get a bad job, it's impossible to not take it home. Thankfully Mrs Shockers is, firstly, insistant on me telling her about bad jobs, and secondly very good to talk to about such things, and for this I am both relieved and grateful. I also consider myself lucky in that my strength has always been that I'm able to deal with things and quickly move on, armed as I am in the knowledge that I did everything I could. I think where you do a job which is a vocation, where it is emotionally challenging, it can be hard to seperate it from your everyday life. Thankfully that's something I've always been able to do. But what I think can be worse than 'taking work home with you' is botteling things up, not expressing them, not feeling them. Many of my work colleagues do this, I've observed, possibly because botteling things up is easier than dealing with them at the time. Everyone I work with are excellent professionals who realy care about their work, but I often see a certain detachment in those people who don't deal with their emotions from work. In short, I think I'm trying to say that it's better to feel than not feel, or pretend you don't feel. The trick is finding ways to deal with it and move on.

As Martin has said - top post, you do vital work that must be really difficult at times - truly a valuable service to all.

Ralph - you also do a top job thats likely undervalued - kudos for you for sticking from what I can tell an at-times infuriating job. However long you last or whatever you do next you have my eternal respect.

[Shockprowl]

Thanks chaps!

[Jim]

Much respect to both Shockprowl and Ralph, I wish I could say I earn my money doing something so worthwhile. I owe my life to an ambulance getting me through terrible traffic to a hospital in time and the support of the paramedics on the way.

I've been working at a public service organisation almost all my working life, one which in theory I respect enormously and feel is a genuinely vital service. However I've seen it gradually erode to commercial pressure, directly and via the government (and insidiously, from within) to the point where the ethical consideration was no longer such a strong factor in staying.

-Jim

[The Doctor]

I spent yesterday from 9am until 4:30pm continuously on one case without breaks. I think it was worthwhile but I suspect the general public would not. I work with folk who have been homeless and that is not a 'sexy' sector of vulnerable people in terms of public awareness of issues compared to cancer, kids and kittens and the tabloids paint a horrible picture of such people. But folk need help. Any of us could end up in dire need at any time now matter who you are or what you currently have.

I walked out of the highest paying job I have ever had (and I doubt I will ever have earnings of that level again) after 9 months without finishing a probationary period at the end of which piles of cash would have been thrown at me because the ethics of it were all wrong.

-Ralph

[Shockprowl]

That's incredible, Doc'. I'm not sure I'd have your strength of character.


9am 'till 4.30pm? That's hard work. One good thing about my job is that all I have to do is get them into hospital. After that I can just say "here you go A&E, bye!". That aspect of it makes my job easier to handle. It's controlled bursts of effort, not sustained effort!

[Marc Graham]

I'm glad I know so many people with jobs - whether appreciated by the public or not - of huge value to people, many of whom are incredibly vulnerable.

Being ethical has always been fairly important to me, at one point a rather large multi-national operating in military munitions and other technology (airline related) opened a software house in town. This resulted in significant protests/etc as well as a separate company opening in town that basically sub-contracted work. I was unprepared to work for either (not because of the protests, I just wouldn't want to say oh yea, I work for company X, we deal in death).

Although that company has since shut, I've reasonably satisfied I'm better off working for a company slightly less evil (depends on your view of insurance I guess).

I'm posting in here because I've been having a tough time lately, both in work and personally, feel like I've been getting by arse handed to me by life, hoping things turn around and looking forward to getting away in a few weeks...

[Andy Turnbull]

I think we all get that way at some times Marc.

I'm just getting my footing back in terms of work now, getting this job was a damned good thing to happen when it did. Finances were in a pretty poor state as a result of chucking in Sky. Personal life wise, it's a bit of a blank slate at the mo, but looking forward to catching up with peeps at Scotcon.

Andy

[Marc Graham]

Weekend was pretty pants in many ways - but just had some good news and I'm really experiencing lifted spirits. Having said that, troubles don't disappear, but I'm hanging in there - throwing myself into my work and just hoping to get out the other side.

Really looking forward to Scotcon and giving out manly hugs to all and sundry!

[The Doctor]

Something of interest:

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-20549154

-Ralph

[legios]

Interesting indeed.

Karl

[Marc Graham]

Music does seem to have an amazing impact on mood.

[Jim]

I find it can happen as sort of a chain; when I first listen to a piece it absorbs some of my current mood and that can affect me on later listens. So I don't tend to play stuff for the first time on miserable, grey days for example. Doing so has ruined a few otherwise good albums for me.