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Post by Fortmax2020 on Aug 14, 2019 21:49:19 GMT
Hubbers at TFN. Please look after this bear. I worry when the boy goes away to camp after all.
- Make sure he eats at least one daily portion of healthy fruit or vegatables. Note: a wet, manky piece of lettuce on a burger does not count.
- Make sure he is not left unattended with an iron. Our young friend struggles to tell if they are hot or not. Even though there was a funky experiment at the recent Wonder Day which showed him how to tell the difference.
- NO EGGS! Or salami meat. I don't know whose room he is sharing but bad things may happen.
- Keep Ralph away from cellotape. It is a natural law of the universe that a grown man will be injured by it.
- Put him to bed by midnight. He needs his forty winks.
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Post by Philip Ayres on Aug 14, 2019 21:52:04 GMT
NO EGGS! Or salami meat. I don't know whose room he is sharing but bad things may happen. Realy, REALLY NO EGGS! Also: Can we have a video of him breaking down and giving all his cash to Nick for Action Masters? |
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Post by Pinwig on Aug 14, 2019 21:54:03 GMT
We will have to set up monitoring posts in the breakfast rooms. Ralph must be attended at all times while visiting the buffet.
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Post by Fortmax2020 on Aug 14, 2019 22:01:04 GMT
I have found the only way to keep him safe is Total Control.
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Post by The Doctor on Aug 15, 2019 7:01:37 GMT
I had eggs at Glasgow Comic Con and was fine. Phil spreads anti-egg propaganda.
-Ralph
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Post by Philip Ayres on Aug 15, 2019 7:09:57 GMT
One successful Hotel Egg experience does not remove the substantial risk the years have exposed!
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Post by Philip Ayres on Aug 15, 2019 7:13:15 GMT
In fact Ralph's Responsible Adults are reminded of the Rules for Ralph in general: tmukhub.proboards.com/thread/6332/rules-ralphTHE CURRENT RULES FOR RALPH ARE: RULE 1: DO NOT MIX YOUR DRINKS!!!!
RULE 2: DO NOT EAT THE EGGS
RULE 3: DO NOT EAT PIZZA WHILE DRINKING
RULE 4: NEVER EAT CURRY FROM A CAN
RULE 5: THOU SHALL NOT GET HOPELESSLY HEE-HAWED ON A DODGY TUMMY AND CHUNDER ALL OVER A HOTEL ROOM AND YOUR OWN TROUSERS
RULE 6: THOU SHALL NOT EAT ALL THE CAKE THAT IS MEANT FOR RALPH AND ANDY
RULE 7: THOU SHALL NOT NECROBUMP!
RULE 8: THOU SHALL NOT COME INTO CONTACT WITH THAT TOY FROM MCDONALDS
RULE 9: THOU SHALL NOT CHEAT AT CONNECT 4, ONLINE OR OTHERWISE
RULE 10: DON'T GO IN THE PISS LIFT
RULE 11: THOU SHALL NOT START A NEW WEEK THREAD EARLY Do we need to add DO NOT DRINK BOOZE FULL STOP to that list? |
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Post by Bogatan on Aug 15, 2019 8:40:45 GMT
The breakfast buffet contains salami. BEWARE!
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Post by The Doctor on Aug 15, 2019 8:42:57 GMT
Hang on. Why does Rule 5 apply to me? It was Andu who did that!!!
-Ralph
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Post by Philip Ayres on Aug 15, 2019 8:57:00 GMT
It's there because you do have a tendancy to dodgy tummys and we don't want you following A Bad Example
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Post by The Doctor on Aug 15, 2019 11:03:29 GMT
But I am not drinking!!!
-Ralph
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Post by Philip Ayres on Aug 15, 2019 11:23:51 GMT
Then you'll have no trouble with rules 1, 3 & 5 and can concentrate on Egg avoidance
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Post by The Doctor on Aug 15, 2019 12:19:32 GMT
Also Rule 9 needs to be struck from the list too. I win with ease at Connect 4. I never cheat.
-Ralph
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Post by The Doctor on Aug 15, 2019 14:15:38 GMT
Argh! Cut my thumb on cellotape!
-Ralph
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Post by Shockprowl on Aug 15, 2019 16:00:37 GMT
Oh Dear God...
I think the way to get me to come to one of these is in order to SAVE THE DOCTOR'S LIFE...
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Post by Fortmax2020 on Aug 15, 2019 16:22:23 GMT
At the rate he is going your skills will be needed before he gets there!
I have updated Ralph's care needs above.
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Post by Philip Ayres on Aug 15, 2019 17:54:15 GMT
Also Rule 9 needs to be struck from the list too. I win with ease at Connect 4. I never cheat. -Ralph Oh we have documented evidence of you cheating at connect four here where you deleted the post when you realised you made the wrong move. THE SECOND TRIAL OF BURNS And anecdotal evidence of much further games cheating elsewhere |
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Post by The Doctor on Aug 15, 2019 18:16:10 GMT
I never cheat...I win!
-Ralph
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Post by Pinwig on Aug 15, 2019 21:55:22 GMT
A Scotsman refusing to be beaten by the £13.50 fish finger sandwich he thought he wanted for tea. flic.kr/p/2gXW9KF |
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Post by blueshift on Aug 15, 2019 21:59:28 GMT
A Scotsman refusing to be beaten by the £13.50 fish finger sandwich he thought he wanted for tea. flic.kr/p/2gXW9KFRalph has given up on the sandwich What would Manimal say?? ? ?? |
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Post by Philip Ayres on Aug 15, 2019 22:21:43 GMT
He'd had a burger at Manchester Picadilly!
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Post by Pinwig on Aug 15, 2019 22:23:29 GMT
He's claiming he's donated it to charity and mumbling something about beating Khan by changing the rules.
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Post by Fortmax2020 on Aug 15, 2019 22:29:55 GMT
Did he eat any of the salad leaves on the plate? If not proper care is not being given to him. Shape up people.
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Post by Pinwig on Aug 15, 2019 22:31:21 GMT
He did. He struggled with it, but greenery was definitely consumed.
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Post by Philip Ayres on Aug 15, 2019 22:48:59 GMT
He's claiming he's donated it to charity and mumbling something about beating Khan by changing the rules. Cheating, the same as every game he ever plays..... ..... As I said earlier! |
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Post by Fortmax2020 on Aug 15, 2019 23:03:42 GMT
He did. He struggled with it, but greenery was definitely consumed. At last. |
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Post by Philip Ayres on Aug 16, 2019 6:32:21 GMT
A Scotsman refusing to be beaten by the £13.50 fish finger sandwich he thought he wanted for tea. flic.kr/p/2gXW9KFRalph has given up on the sandwich What would Manimal say?? ? ?? Why would you give up on this Sandwich?  Unless of course you'd had a burger earlier |
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Post by Fortmax2020 on Aug 16, 2019 8:01:07 GMT
List updated. Again.
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Post by The Doctor on Aug 16, 2019 8:31:33 GMT
ANDU IS A !&!^!^;@;@!!!!
He said we get up at 8am. Ralph sets alarm for 8am. ANDU PUTS ON LIGHT AND SHOUTS AT RALPH AT 7:52AM AND TIME TO GET UP RALPH TIME TO GET UP.
He robbed me of 8 minutes!!! 8 fucking minutes!!! He will pay for this. I didn't get to sleep until around 3am!!!
-Ralph
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Post by Philip Ayres on Aug 16, 2019 8:41:08 GMT
I think the 3am is the bit we should concentrate on here
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